So, the other night I came across what I think is probably one of the best thoughts ever (I need to find it again so that I can credit the author). It went something like:
“Don’t spread any more hate into the world.”
That’s a fantastic sentiment. Isn’t adding hate to the world something that we all do, without giving it any thought at all?
There is too much hate in the world already, and more being added all the time. Most of it is not intentional but imagine the difference if we all consciously cut back on how much hate we added each day.
Every snide little comment, every jibe or criticism. A joke at someone else’s expense. A snub. A little untruth, an unfounded accusation or some gossip. The tone of your voice. (Keep in mind the power of the Butterfly Effect.)
Think of your hate as matter, once you put it out there it will always remain out there, somewhere in the world and you can’t take it back.
But we don’t want to be holding hate inside of ourselves, so how do we get rid of it?
Hate is so big, its everywhere. People feel it, some hold onto it and some express it without even knowing. Personally I try not to use the term ‘I hate’. I physically stop myself from saying or even thinking it. I have done this for a while now. I don’t know what started it, or when it started I just know that I try my best to not use it. Its working.
That simple act has had a massive impact with the amount of compassion and understanding I feel for others. By not allowing myself to say that I hate something, I force myself to think a little more carefully about how I really do feel. Invariably I find that I don’t even dislike what or who I thought I hated.
Here’s a crazy little concept: every time we feel or express hate a little bit of that hate is left inside of us. You can maybe start to understand what that’s doing to us on the inside. Its a cancer that grows and spreads inside us without us even knowing its there.
So not only are we clogging-up and polluting our environment with hate but we are killing ourselves. Read “How you can change the whole world”
I have gotten to the stage now that I really do pity people who hate. What a lot of wasted energy and emotion. Wasting your life away on hate.
We can be so careless and damaging with the tiniest of thoughts, the smallest expression. We sow seeds in our own mind and into the minds of others. When we stand on the sideline of a sports field and accuse the Referee of cheating, we are announcing to the world that he is a person of poor character that cannot be trusted. We say that and we don’t even know him.
Sometimes it are the things that we do not say.
How can we hate someone if we don’t even know them, if we have never met them? Where does that hate come from?
It comes from inside of us, we are merely projecting the hate that we hold inside onto someone else. The more that you hate someone or something points only to the amount of hate that you carry inside of you.
This is true of mistrust, anger, sadness, loss and deceit. You see them only if they exist within you first. But the same is true of love, happiness and compassion.
To change the world around may mean that first of all we need to look within us and change what we see. Not just plan to change something, or to just think about it or write it down, actually making a change. Start living the way we want our world to be.
It takes practice, you won’t get it right straight away and you will relapse, but if you decide that you want to be a less hateful person living among less hateful people, start living as that less hateful person. It doesn’t take anymore than that. Be aware of the words you use, the language you use and the tone of your voice. When you sense a hateful feeling, no matter how small and trivial it may seem, simply stop it before it has time to grow and you find yourself expressing it.
I hope that we won’t all need therapy in order to change our world.
Hands-up, I can be the world’s worst when it comes to making wise cracks about or to someone. And I know that I tend to do it to those who I love or like the most. They are the easiest targets, the safest ones because I know that they won’t thump me for doing it and I hope that they are strong enough of character to absorb it without too much harm. But I am working on stopping it, because they don’t deserve it and that is not the kind of world that I want to live in.
I want to live in a fairer, kinder and more ethical New Zealand.